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Are you talking to someone online? Do you trust them? Could they be a catfisher, a scammer, a scallywag or a con-artist?

How Monica Draper, a 55-year-old, Ontario based graphic designer, lost $100,000 is not unheard of. How could she fall in love with a notorious online Lothario, who had an outstanding warrant out for his arrest? She accepts that her money is gone. But, she is still amazed that the fellow she met on the dating website, Plenty of Fish, was able to abscond with her money as well as the life savings of at least a half-dozen other women, so easily. The truth is she was “catfished”.

A catfisher is the new name coined to describe a bottom dwelling human, who spends a great deal of time on the net in various locations like online dating sites, and social media sites, luring people into romances and then stealing their money. A catfisher uses fake pictures, bogus profiles and cunning manipulation, drawing their victims into a state of trust through infatuation. Often the victim has low self-esteem and insecurity with their self-image and when a person appears online to be interested in them, bingo, a match is made! The victim falls hard for this Romeo, that they deem way out of their league. In truth, the seducer is faking it. And is running this con on other people as well. In short, a catfisher is a scammer and con. The prevalence of online dating predators grows more copious every day.

According to research 4,288,595 people per month use Match.com, and visit the site a total of 26,200,000 times a month. The total Match.com membership is 15 million people. The total eHarmony membership is 20 million lonely hearts.

• Is plenty of fish full of fake profiles? Yes it has a lot of fakes and scammers, but so do other date sites. They are not as bad as many of the others, but all of the site, even the pay ones, have this problem. Can you get scammed on POF? How POF Scams Work.
• There are plenty of fish (POF) in the sea, and a lot of the profiles smell really fishy! As with many free dating sites, there are going to be fake profiles. The online consensus is POF leads the way with fake profiles. However, POF has one of the better fake profile removal rates vor profiles that spam. That's if enough people complain about a fake profile.

Compare that to the total number of single people in the United States, which is 54 million, it is not possible that half the single US population is a member of an online dating site! Especially when the trade journal, Online Dating Magazine estimates that there are more than 2,500 online dating services in the U.S. alone, with 1,000 new online dating services opening every year. Some estimates say there are 8,000 competitors worldwide. That means many people that join three or more dating sites.

On the free dating sites, at least 10% of new accounts are from scammers, says Marketdata Enterprise, Inc. Interested in catfishing, anyone?

Dinner for Six, a matchmaking service in Denver, Colorado says that 51% percent of online dating members are putting themselves out there as being single, when they are in some kind of relationship. According to MSNBC, research shows that 11% of people using online dating services are married.

More than 53% of Americans fabricate parts or all of their dating profile details, according to Huffington Post. Some lies are so blatant, like weight or height, that their dates can spot the untruths in the first few seconds of meeting them. In fact, a third of those surveyed said falsified information is so prevalent, that it prevents them from going on a second date.

How to Spot a Fake Plenty Of Fish Profile - How to Report a Fake Plenty Of Fish Profile The person is extremely attractive.② There is. Here are the steps you can take to determine how genuine a profile on POF is. Their profile looks out of the ordinary, with over the top pictures or About Me sections. Sometimes the images are out of place, showing cleavage or their swimsuit. These are undoubtedly fake profiles unless they have more than a few pics, and some of them are tasteful. The about me pages of fake profiles are usually short and monotonous.

More than 40% of men try to swoon women by lying about their jobs, trying to make their career sound more prestigious. It makes sense every woman wants a guy with a great job, for example a guy in the entertainment industry is a lot more interesting than someone selling tickets at the local movie theater. eHarmony mentions that a study found men who reported incomes higher than $250,000 received 156% more email than those declaring an income of $50,000. That’s 156% more gold-diggers! So guys, think twice about whether you want to post your personal income.

In 2011, the FBI Internet Crime Complaint Center lodged 5,600 complaints from victims of “romance scams” or “catfishers”. The reporting victims lost over fifty million dollars. But, it’s suspected that these numbers are much less than actual, as many people are too embarrassed to come forward.

In 2005 alone, 25% percent of rapists used online dating sites to find their victims. Let me repeat that: twenty-five percent of rapists used online dating sites to find their victims. Each year internet predators commit more than 16,000 abductions, 100 murders and thousands of rapes, according to InternetPredatorStat.homestead.com

Tyler Cohen Wood is an expert in social media and cyber issues. She is a Cyber Branch Chief for an Intelligence Agency within the Department of Defense (DoD). She is the author of the book - Catching the Catfishers: Disarm the Online Pretenders, Predators and Perpetrators Who Are Out to Ruin Your Life. It outlines some typical characteristics and warning signs of an online scammer and offer suggestions on how to protect yourself from catfishers. The good news is that you can protect yourself by learning how to spot a phony while dating online. . .

1. What if this person won’t video chat?

Using SYPE, Facetime, Google Hangouts or even Snapchat with a person that you meet online is normal practice in online dating. If a person makes excuses every time you want to SKYPE, it is a red flag. Be concerned if the area code of their cell number is a not listed in the domestic list of area codes. Areas codes that start with 473, 809, 284, 649, 654 and 876 are international, and are known to have been used for scams. Also be aware if there is a very bad connection every time you speak to them (such as a poor international connection) or no voice mail is attached to the number.

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2. What happens when you Google them?

Almost everyone in the United States has some sort of Internet presence. It is very rare that someone would have no Internet presence at all. If you do basic research, such as conducting a search using a portal such as www.WhitePages.com , www.Spokeo.com or by looking through social media sites, and can’t find anything about this person, that is a red flag. Most professionals will at least have a LinkedIn page. If you cannot find anything on the Internet about a person, they might not be telling you their real name, which is again, a red flag.

3. Check public records.

Do some reconnaissance by using search engines to find public records- www.intelius.com, or www.publicrecords.searchsystems.net. If a person says they own a house, you will be able to easily see where it is and how long they have lived there. You can also find legal documents like bankruptcy filings, divorce records and death records. It is well worth the ten dollars to spend on a Spokeo.com membership to learn the truth about a scammer.

4. Do they send real time photos of themselves?

When people are communicating online, ask to be sent a selfie, right then. If they refuse, or make some excuse, that is a red flag. If they have only sent you one or two photos, it is likely that they stole that photo from someone else’s Facebook page or from elsewhere on the Internet. Don’t be fooled by photos of kids or an elderly Mom. Do a reverse image Google search- right-click on their photos, copy the URL, and paste in the box at images.google.com. Google will then search for other sources of that image online.

5. How many “real” friends and work colleagues are on this person’s social media sites? How many people communicate with this catfisher?

You can get to know a lot about a person’s friends and family based on the banter they engage in on social media. How many posts are started by the potential catfisher? How many responses? Do they tag their photographs? On LinkedIn, do they have colleagues who have endorsed them? I even ask their LinkedIn colleagues if they know this person, yes, I really did that!

6. Do they deflect or never answer your questions when you ask detailed, specific questions?

Do they avoid answering your probing questions? Do you find that they deflect from your original question and the subject changes? Do you stop probing as a result? These are red flags. If you feel as if you are the only one sharing information and they are not giving away any details, consider this a red flag.

7. Do their stories match up?

If someone is pretending to be someone they’re not, they may have a difficult time keeping up with their fake persona. Colleges are the easiest reference to check. Call the alumni office to verify whether this person is in the alumni directory. Ask about their hometown, their kids, their colleges, ask often, and listen for a slip-up.

8. By the way, how is their spelling or their command of the English language?

We all make silly spelling mistakes, but if the person you are communicating with uses strange grammar and makes odd spelling mistakes continuously, maybe these writings are all coming directly from Google Translation. Proceed with caution.

9. You will receive everything you would want to hear from a Prince Charming.

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“You are so beautiful”, “I think you are someone special”, “I love you” or you receive a marriage proposal, sometimes all within the first twenty-four hours of meeting this person online. Need I say red flag to this one?

10. In the first few days, are the communications hot and heavy with frequent emails, texting and contact? What happens next?

It takes five to seven days of hot and heavy intrigue, seduction, in pursuit of the development of trust. Then it is time for the “ask”. Usually this period of time is accompanied by the building up of the “story”. This story could be a “colossal break”, a deal so big they can retire on it, or they are working on the business opportunity of a life time. Once they have your trust, then at the end of the week, there is a disaster. A partner pulls out of the deal, leaving the scammer high and dry. Or they need some cash to finalize the deal or in order to complete some business obligations. They need to bribe corrupt local officials, or they may have been “robbed” and lost all of their belongings. Just about any story will do, and it is usually a large amount of money that will satisfy them. What is totally amazing is that if you say no, that will not stop the con-artist from asking again, again and again.

There are a great variety of personality roles scammers use, as well. The first step scammers use is appearing on a dating or social media site with a fake profile and credentials. Some roles are saying they are an a widow, that have grieved the loss of their spouse for a decade, a lonely American soldier stationed overseas, or an entrepreneur working in oil, diamonds or gold.

Most important thing to remember is never give these people any money. Once the money is transferred, the scammer simply disappears, leaving you with a broken heart and an empty bank account. There is little chance of prosecution or recovery since these scammers are often located in other countries.

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Of course, not everyone is out to scam you. There are plenty of legitimate individuals seeking a partner on these dating sites. The intention of this post is not to make you paranoid. Ultimately, if you’re doubting this online Lothario – you’re most likely right. If you encounter some of the scenarios and warning signs I have listed above, end the relationship immediately, never arrange a date and never, ever give this person any money. Be the fish that got away

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Melissa Killeen is a recovery coach, author, blogger and public speaker on living a life in recovery. Her book Recovery Coaching-Coaching People in Recovery from Addictions is the first book on recovery coaching. She is well versed in coaching those with behavioral addictions which include sex and love addiction. Love addicts are particularly susceptible to catfishers and scammers. You can contact Melissa on her web site http://www.mkrecoverycoaching.com/